Hi everyone!!!
I dont even know where to begin on the things God has taught me the last few months, but I really firmly believe that its safe to say that when I left home, I was a girl. This time, I really believe that I'm going home a woman (or at least the beginning stages). God has really healed me of so many things that I dont think I would've even known about if I had done anything else in my life these past few months. The lessons haven't been easy; one thing thats been the hardest has been learning to love the unlovable. I've been learning that although its easy to love the people that are similar to you etc, there's nothing too special about that because anyone can love someone who's easy to love. Its when you can love the people who act in a way you have a hard time tolerating...that you know you're on the right path. God has been turning my mind inside out---just changing all the ways I think about life as well as the way I see myself. I've seen so many people come to the Lord, so many families wanting to restore relationships, so many miracles where people who couldn't walk or see were able to. These are things that I know I'll never forget, and I know God is going to work in mighty ways in the years to come just from the things he started through the team I've been a part of. This week, we were in Vegas and I learned SO much. I really believe God wants to turn that city around, and although I want to find time to write more about the experience, i want to just say right now that God really showed me through going to Vegas, that he still loves those people just as much as he loves us. Nothing makes us better,,,,and really when you think about it, the only difference is that we're not sinning as openly, and we've received God's grace. God has really just been breaking my heart more and more for the people that dont have Christ in their lives. As I'm getting closer to coming home (2 weeks exactly), I still dont really know for sure what God wants next for me. No idea what my ministry will be or anything like that. I just know that I'm not going back to how I was and I know too that I have a mission to help the lost. Some of us have been asking ourselves and each other why God has allowed us to perform at mostly churches and schools and most of the people we've been meeting already know about God etc. I kind of think its because even though yes God wants to reach the non-Christians, there are some people who know God who are utterly lost. I've been seeing more and more that even though it'd surprise you, Americans are some of the most lost people in the world. I say that because even with the other countries where you're not allowed to talk about God, most of the people are receptive. Americans on the other hand...most of us know ABOUT God's love. We just dont believe IN it. We're so numb and we cower behind walls that we've created. I really think that right now God wants to build up those people. He wants to change the church from being so denominational to something where as long as we all worship Him and have relationship with Him, thats really all that matters. It could be my generation, my kids, or my future grandchildren...but either way, God wants to build us up so we can be warriors for Him. We have such a big job and its not coincidence that we have the passions that we have. God wants to use those in us for His glory. We have to reject the lies of the devil though first. I have so much more that I'd like to share, but for now I'd just like to ask for your prayers. I want to finish school well and not just see this as the last few weeks, and therefore I can do whatever and have a lazy attitude. I'd like prayer that God would direct me to where I'm supposed to go when I get home/what I'm supposed to do. And prayer that God would finish the healing that he started in my heart and that I'd let him. Thank you guys SO much for supporting me and loving me through this journey! Thank you also for being patient and understanding about my internet situation with not being able to post as much as I'd like, and also for bearing with me when I do post something, since usually I'm exhausted. :) Love you all, Kallayah :)
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